Weetabix is a brand of breakfast cereal. In the space of all things, there is perhaps nothing farther removed from chess than breakfast cereals. So why on Earth would an advertisement agency decide to makes an advertisement for Weetabix entirely about chess? Because chess is the best, obviously, so they naturally wanted to cram it in nonetheless. And so they decided to show an apparently hugely important match between a Soviet player, Berkmann, and a Polish one, Korrobov.1
The setting is very convincing, with an old school Gardé clock, a huge, manual demonstration board on either side on the podium, and a large hall full of silent spectators. We are dropped in the middle of the game, just after Korrobov, with black and a lot of confidence, has made his move. Berkmann takes recourse to a deep, deep thought.2
This, I believe, is the position he is pondering, although perhaps some more pieces are hidden on white’s king’s side:3
In fact, I suspect that a black queen may be hiding there, for otherwise I see no reason for white to worry: Qf6, for example, should put a quick end to the game.
But Berkmann doesn’t move. What is the problem? Even if there is a black queen on, say, h1 there is not so much to think about. The queen is hanging and if you lose it the game is over. But then he asks a question:
Berkmann: Um, what colour was I again?4
You see, he has been withoutabix. But there’s an upside: it means I don’t have to make up my own wordplay of dubious quality.
Realism: 2/5 None of the pieces are too far from a normal place, but the whole is very far from a normal place.
Probable winner: That depends on what’s hiding on that king’s side. If there’s a lot of black pieces there, it might be black. Otherwise, it’s going to be white.
1. [It would sound much more plausible the other way around, right? Although I don’t quite see where the second ‘r’ in Korrobov would come from if it were a transliteration from Cyrillic.] ↩
2. [Which is, of course, illegal.] ↩
3. [Or maybe there’s a link to a diagram editor hiding in a footnote?] ↩
4. [Purple, I guess?] ↩